Quote:
Originally Posted by Silverhaze
I started this post to get a feel for how I feel. I love seeing things from everyone's perspective it helps me understand my own thoughts and feelings so much better.
Here is where I am at now. I feel that when I truely love someone that love overpowers lust though they can dig it up if they like.
I think my real issue is not between love and lust, but in the 'relationship box'
I know here on IS many people have a different level in their relationships but my idea of the real world relationship disgusts me
it is a box
they put your love in a box
and that breaks my heart
I can't stand the thought of someone trying to limit my love to purely romantic and lustful
when so much of true love to me is a free thing that knows no bounds
I do not understand jealousy when it comes to love
I would not be able to have a relationship with a normal person because I could not limit myself to loving them most, or first, or only
and my love would vary depending on the situation
perhaps that is where the problem is I can't stand having this fixed idea of love when it is always changing and I love so many people in so many ways and everytime I have been in a relationship I always feel that it is limiting my freedom to love everyone
the expectations and the ideas of I'm more important to you and you're more important that me
and we're more important than everyone
that just doesn't work for me
I can't contain my love to the relationship box
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You're right, society does put love and relationships in a box, which is very limiting and causes a great deal of pain.
Society tells us that it's only ok to have a relationship with one person at a time, and that if you feel something for someone else then that's 'bad' and 'wrong'. It lays down all these rules which must be followed, and says that it is a great sin to break them.
I believe this is a form of collective ego, and comes from the basic unconsciousness in which people feel unfulfilled, and are constantly looking outside of themselves for some satisfaction. So when they feel love with someone they become very dependant on that person to sustain their feeling of love, which will inevitably lead to pain and suffering because all forms are temporary and constantly changing. We believe that love is dependant on another person feeling a certain way about us because we think we are getting our love from them - when the opposite is the case, that love comes through us, and in the unawakened state only does so because our minds tell us that we have satisfied the material criteria to feel it. Love is merely our natural state of felt oneness with being and a gratitude for existance, it is part of who we are, feeling and knowing ourselves directly in our oneness with the totality. But because most people are identified with their minds, they only feel love in the beginning of relationships, when we feel like we've found love, that we've got there, and the other person gives us validation and seems to be the 'proof' the ego needs to allow the love to be felt, at least for a while. Soon however, the circumstances will change, and our mind, believing these had to be just so for there to be love, cut us off - which causes heartbreak.
At least that's how I can best describe it from my experiences.