TheRavenMother

Spiders freak me out to! Although I do not know why. I tell myself they are beautiful and I was always told, they are more afraid of you then you are them!! which may or may not be true but it comforts me knowing that ok, at least a few of them hafta be afraid!!
They are though very beautiful almost majestic creatures!! but i get shaky when I notice them around. I recently moved into a basement suite full of them, like I would see at the least one a day. Soo I eventually said out loud, and tried to send out images with my mind, to the spiders.
I basically made a pact- I won't kill you, but you need to stay away from me. When I do see them I dont kill but I repeat that to the spiders!! Since doing this I rarely see a spider now. It is nice maybe it will help if you say that when you are working on your spell working! even explaining to them that they frighten you might be helpful.
Also that is to bad about your experience as a child... kids are so mean to each other!! but I bet those spiders didn't appreciate being thrown at and on you, i'm sure they likely sensed your fear as well of them. That would comfort me, knowing you were both being forced into a situation you didn't want, so you shouldn't blame them blame those boys!!
also, I got shivers reading how far the jumping spiders can jump. I almost wish I hadn't read that!! lol

it is interesting that shortly after recieving a visit from spider woman you had such a traumatic experience involving her children.(the spiders not the boys). i too have arachniphobia. as long as i can remember i've been terrified of them. even before i knew consciously they could be poisonous. if i see one i get the sensation that they are all over me. and yes the freakiest is when i think they're in my hair. what you lived through is in my world a small version of hell. but i think it is also very tragic that your mother didn't show (in my opinion) a proper response and help you get them off of you. and that now you turn to the spider mother for guidance. from what little experience i have working with her... i know she is the weaver of fate the universe and creator of alphabets and pictographs as well as language. you seem to be gifted with or at least have a firm command of language. as do i. as for fate and the universe who can say? i dare to say she may have been trying to teach you something of human nature. as tanisha said. it was the boys who were cruel not the spiders. it probably was true in that case that they were just as frightened. but there is so much tied (pardon the pun) in with creating the web of your phobia. your mothers lack of response to your fear the boys' cruelty to both you and the spiders. plus the long and frightening night of them trying to escape your hair. i would be interested in hearing more about what you learn about this experience after meditating on spider mother. if it wouldn't bother you. also the connection with hair and the threads they make their webs with. in many different faiths hair is said to carry the spiritual essence of a person. scientifically you can map a persons genetics through a single strand of hair. perhaps some of this may help you. all i know is there comes a point when we must confront our fears. because we attract what we fear most sometimes. so all the courage and healing to you.