This is Lord Voldemort speaking. Friends call me V-dog, but you can call me Voldy or Mr.V, I need serious help..my cat pooped on my precious wand and know it farts everytime i try to hold it, and when I try to say a spell, it starts throwing pink shiny stars all over the place. Is here an iPhone application that will get me out of this misery?
Eternity is a mere moment, just long enough for a joke.
fart plus pink stars... mmm... that sounds to me like fart-o-pinknessis.
it is something to worry about, because of the tendency that syndrome has to scramble the micro digestive system of the magic-wood.
and indeed, a complex constellation of energetic and protoplasmic factors that can result in the altered signalling observed in your particular brand of magic wand.
but you are right my bald nose-less friend.
there is something you can do with your iphone. but it's tricky i tell you...
it is a very precise combination of 3 particular apps
angry birds, fruit ninja and the wall street journal mobile.
your phone needs jailbreak, but the process of installing and running the apps must be timed precisely following the beat of the magnetic fields of both the iphone and the wand.
i suggest just going to the diagon alley. it's much simpler that way.
peace out v-dog!
i'm harry poopter in case you didn't recognize me btw