i would congratulate you on making it this far but your arrival was inevitable

[amandip]

emotional retardation; what do you do to compensate? do you create new victim-fied situations for yourself to dwell on? Do you fear the inevitable? is your fear inevitable? is it inevitable that by reading this you will go into denial?? The ego is a genius that tricks you, by causing "confusion", by making it seem like none of this makes sense, by making it possible that by listening to this, more effort is required. Why does the brain fear spirituality? becase the brain is lazy, but efficient, but lazy; spiritual advancement requirse high amounts of energy, so your brain does anything to resist. by watching your thinkingness, you will realize that the thoughts are not yours, but there exist an energy field in your mind, a thinking field that has become so dependant on eating cactus instead of easier to swallow vegetation. now that you know its all fake, what will you do with it? have you not experienced the worst? is it not time for the best? instead of projecting fear outside of you, why not transmute and use it?

Am i that gone that i cant decide what i want? is it a done deal? have i become too aware? is it a defect? what do i do with it? is it time to leave? Do i take as many as i can with me and pull a columbine? or do i do the "hardest" thing? sit n watch? have i not done that for long enough? isnt it time to bounce? get away from the illusion?

no, because this illusion is the highlight of existance. existance on its own is boring, viewed from here, but "herE" is boring, viewed from the number line. if i exist so that i May, then its July and i should be in the sun having fun, giving and taking, but always finding a way to take more than receive. if your neurotransmitters are conscious, they follow your orders, so give good ones, or face consequences, which are just experiences, which are just illusions, which is just life, which is just an illusion, which is just a consequence of ignorance (which is just a neccesity).


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salam alakam

[lillies1978]

Nice I like it.

[beautifulmind]

Ouch. As much as it hurts my ego it hit directly in the soul.

[existencebeyondexperience]

i liked it. i presume the middle part is rhetorical, not to be answered directly?

[AmentiHall]

Yes thank u for sharing

[sshenry]

if your neurotransmitters are conscious, they follow your orders, so give good ones, or face consequences, which are just experiences, which are just illusions, which is just life, which is just an illusion, which is just a consequence of ignorance (which is just a neccesity).

Priceless

[amandip]

i liked it. i presume the middle part is rhetorical, not to be answered directly?

you could call it rhetorical and with it you would have to apply that concept to life in general to really nail the best word for describing every conscious, aware moment in time.

this spiritual tail chasing seems to take a long time, but you were right when you said its only the beginning. hell, if anything, the temporary insanity is a sign that you are ready and the cooldown period is over. life is this self perpetuating gas guzzler that is fueled off beliefs. we end up trapping ourselves in holes because we dont have something/someone to tell us what to do, because we think we need to adopt certain beliefs and act a certain way and abstain from different things/possibilities. anything and everything that is experienced is to help you facilitate your arrival to this point; where you realize, or remember rather, that its just a montage, and that the only point in you being here is to create what you want as you go, living frozen in the moment (plan too far ahead... no bueno). meditation, deep breathing, religions, buddha, jesus, self help, let go let god, indigos, crystals, live in the now, try your hardest, forgive and forget, there is no past or future, the lessons are already learned, always think positive, etc etc etc... in the confusion of descencion from the number line we perceive a feeling of being thrown out of heavan by God and so our search begins. looking outside of us for something to rely on, so that the primitive ego mind would be at ease. "searchin high n low, behind the door, inside the dro, little did we know the beat was tryin to find the flow". and so it is. so many things i created for myself to help me arrive at a steady easy mind where i would be able to create at will instead of unintentionally.

"created for myself". more like chose a possibility off the number line of infinite existance to symbolically represent something in my "life". the illusion of life is quickly falling apart before my eyes and i dont know how to express the ecstasy non physically so ill go to the store and grab a 10 pack of trojans

any and every post i ever make here is completely rhetorical. a conversation with myself. which is why i get so heated when i face opposition. however, ive found to listen to be able to see every perspective and sort out whats lived past its use.

finding the symbology in little things day to day helps. money was always a problem until the illusion was reavealed; moneys not a thing on its own. it represents a creative energy. we want money because we associate it with abundance, when all abundance is is the freedom to do what you want, when you want. there is no one else actually in ur reality; what you see is ur energy interacting with theirs in a way u both agreed upon earlier; the person you see with money living the life you want, they represent the version of you that is mentally at ease and in charge and creates by will and not unintentionally by subconscious beliefs

this was easy to clear, and now the money rolls in, and im financially secure, on to the next hike

[amandip]

i close my eyes and try to see your eyes open up
but something tells me you're cool, so i chill

life is hard and what we never thought comes to be
i understand now, cousin im a man now
your physical is gone but ur still a part of me lol
shed the light down while i shut this land down

so many of you expect life to never cease
but what is life? what is war? what is peace?

id rather see your soul blessed and your body rest
than to c ur soul die just to live in flesh

as i glanced at your body breathless, i cried still, but what my cousin left us
he left a message
its no life
its no death
its no tears
its no pain
its only gods will

hus*alah

salam alakam

[Amoeba]

Disregard this post.

[cindy]

amandip....i love you. you echo my mind...as you echo in the minds of so many at this time. this stage is a beautiful but sometimes lonely place to be. but with each step closer to the light you shed off the loneliness.
and the death of a loved one (some will go omg) is a wonderful way to fast forward through school. once you realise the advantages of this experience you can close the book on a huge chapter...hugs xxx

[Amoeba]

I can only vaguely understand all this. I must be overlooking something obvious.

[cindy]

well in a nutshell...and this is my translation in relating..its a stage some pass through in their path of spiritual development...the burning desire to share the beauty that you are experiencing...but also feeling alone so you want everyone else to wake up to what you see so a feeling of wanting to shake them awake...seems cold to those around but its a chemical reaction beyond control due to the changes that happen...and when viewed in the right light its beautiful to see someone there...like a birth xxx

[Amoeba]

I see, thanks for the summary. I guess not being able to identify with that makes it harder to understand.

[cindy]

and that can compound it for the one who is experiencing it...makes it so hard to relate to people...this way of thought consumes your mind...but the balance comes...xxx

[5stars]

So much wisdom echoes. The ego tricks us into believing someone else knows the truth, some else has the answers, something else is responsible for our happiness so we are always seeking outside ourselves. We already have the answers, we already know the truth but we are to afraid to face it. To face our glory to face our magnificent because if we did… we could not play this game anymore and the ego hates change. Even when the change could be incredible. The fear of the unknown is the most persistent.

[sukayna]

Alaykum Sallaam,
Amandip

[5stars]

Shalom aliekum,

I have your solution

Drugs keep us detached from ourselves.

[cerise333]

that was awesome amandip thanx =)

[amandip]

life can be summarized in 2 questions

1. why do i exist?

anything and everything that has and ever will exist, already exists, as a possibility, completely free of matter/physical existance. all of existance is just a number line, and each possibility being a number on the line, from 0 to infinite. and to infinite i mean the spot at the end of the number line where you can look back across the whole of existence (which would make you God).

some where along this number line exists the possibilty for conscious and aware entities, one or more of which created physical reality to play around in. "heavan"/the void/source or whatever u want to call it, the "place" we originate from, exists in perfect order, at ALL times (although there, time doesnt exist obviously). you are this entity that is having a dream and playing around here. you got bored and decided to share ur story of enlightenment. everyone is dreaming together

2. what is the meaning of life?
accept the truth that you are not a human being, but you are consciousness, having an experience, with the human body being your vessel. the human body is a robot that is preprogrammed (it has a mind of its own, literally, but you chose every aspect of it before entering physical existance). the control mechanism for this vehicle of ours is emotion. there are only 2 E-motions, and the other emotions are derivatives of the two, love and fear. love is lust to live, fear is perceived "death". everything u like, u feel would help u feel good and prolong survival (reason for drug abuse; besides "knowing" its bad u do it cuz it "feels" good) and things you resist are things u feel in someway eventually would kill you. well. the ego thinks all of this. not you. you are consciousness. consciousness has nothing to lose, and everything to gain from the experience.
the AI of the human robot gives it instructions/objectives (instincts) that are carried out at ALL times by the robot (whether you realized or not). the main objective of the human robot mind is 1. survival/keep living in order to 2. reproduce/keep the species going.
anything, and everything, that you have ever wanted in life, was to give you a positive feeling, thereby ensuring that you will carry on to survive and reproduce. negative feelings are perceived from experiences/people that threaten survival (and therefore reproduction). you think someone doesnt like you, and you feel fear/bad/worried/nervous when around them. why? because you think them feeling that way about you means thats what you are and they will tell someone else and it will ruin your reputation you'll b embarassed so on so forth all the way to "i wont find a mate". bad marks in school? worried that you wont pass/graduate/get a job/money/food/survive/reproduce. very general, but u get the idea. it can be applied to EVERYTHING (try it). now it is no wonder why ascension/transendance is a "hard" process. the ego/human body thinks its going to die. which is a neccesity, otherwise we'd reach enlightenment at the age of 2 minutes. this is also the metaphor represented by jesus/christianity. jesus died for humanity's sins. and now the ego must die for its sins. and be reborn. where it goes from here? i care not, because i finally made it. im finally sane. and by sane i mean insane. and that makes me feel sane.

why is "life" centered around this? as humans we take life for granted, and dont want to believe that "everything that exists does because it can". think about the people in ur life that are a little too into christianity or whatever religion. they would call this idea the devil.

think about everything in ur life. the whole thing. negatives and positives.
all the hardships u went through, all the will power, all the suffering, everything, was because of the "natural" but preprogrammed instinct instruction to survive at all costs. whether it was through doing good in school, or having to rob people for a living, being a bum and eating out of mcdonalds dumpster every night becuz u found out they throw away all their food and you havnt had a fish fillet in forever but only for a while cuz now you cant because they found out all the bums were doing it so they mix coffee grounds into the left over food, alllll of this, happened because these people were subconciously aiming for survival (when drugs/addictions/etc are involved, the human body's cells have lost receptors for the naturally produced neurotransmitters, and is now reliant on the drug to activate these centers that say OK GOOD TO GO SURVIVAL IS ENSURED, so the body literally thinks that it will die if it doesnt drink/smoke/overeat/pick ur butt/whatever mood changes you have). try it. pick apart any and every thought/need/want you ever have. all day everyday. keep asking why, why, why? until u get to "oh, cuz i wanna survive". (people helping other people: generosity is aiding in a different entities need to survive).

why does everything just exist on its own?

physical "life" is to show you the extremes you would go to to survive and exist. heard of those roots/flowers that grow THROUGH solid rock to sprout?

there is nothing stronger in this universe (or mathematical reality, whatever) than human will power, which is just the the drive to survive.


the meaning of life is to explain why we exist, and we exist because its impossible to not exist.

and of course, there would be no point unless it was a completely unique experience. you are the only one in ur reality. everyone else is there "physically" but you are the one consciousness. EVERYTHING is in ur hands, you have complete control. however, realizing that the only neccesary action is acceptance. there are numerous ways for you to interact with a person. in one life they may be ur frend, in another ur son, in another ur teacher, in another they mite jus b someone that walked by. you get to decide which version of the person you would like in ur experience, and you communicate telepathically to their higher self. is mind control possible? absolutely. however, a truly awakened person would never attempt, not because its wrong, but because they dont need to. only newbies to the spiritual world attemp to control their surroundings, never realizing that nothing physical exists until created mentally by you first.

r u asking urself why the meaning of life is to show that the instinct to survive is what makes existance what it is if this INSTINCT is "preprogrammed?" who programmed existance to exhibit this instinct as well?

the first possibility, on this number line, is the DESIRE/ABSOLUTE NECCESITY to live/exist/survive, and that was all that was needed to create all of existence.


im done


thats it


i made it


dont care what happens from here because i am in full control (and by control i mean i completely accepting and at at peace with my existance and why i came here). my lifes horoscope that was done in india has accurately predicted (i realize horoscopes do not predict the future but rather reflect the future if u carry on the way u do at that moment) my life to date. personality, my horrible eyes, years of my life that would b good/bad for me, good/bad for my dad, etc. it says when i turn 22 i wll be in complete bliss and heavan. january 6th is the date, and i cant help but notice how everything is slowly falling into place as i approach. i feel at this/that point, i will have a choice whether to stay here or leave. suicide runs across my mind. it used to be ego produced, just because of the addiction to the immense emotion the thought would create, but now it comes as a quiet thought with no emotions. of course ill be ignoring that, because that would go against the meaning of life, and besides ive been drowning in my own shithole that i shitted into in the first place for nearly 22 years. i kno acceptance and blablabla, but i can still hear the ego. the door to his room is shut, so i dont hear him yelling, but i can still hear him. now hes just laughing and rolling around. waiting for whats to come. he knows hes been a bad boy but he is forgiven and cherishd and rewarded and life is going to be better than ever.i wish you all the best, thank you for everything "if u didnt get to be a part of this at least you got to witness"

salam alakam
may it exist forever n ever (and it will, because it can)

---------- Post added at 06:46 PM ---------- Previous post was at 05:53 PM ----------

.its a stage some pass through in their path of spiritual development...the burning desire to share the beauty that you are experiencing...but also feeling alone so you want everyone else to wake up to what you see so a feeling of wanting to shake them awake...seems cold to those around but its a chemical reaction beyond control due to the changes that happen

oh wow. that explains a lot. lmao. *blush*

[amandip]

ever heard that only 10% (or somethin like that) of our DNA is used, the rest is "junk"

Who am i?

DNA is the software for life, that makes the hardware (physical reality).
It seems that from the genetic coding, an entire universe is constructed. DNA (and hence your life) are controlled through emotion. there is a on switch (love based emotions) and a off switch (fear based emotions). humans are made for this, since we have the huge frontal lobe which gives us the ability to CHANGE OUR MIND... WHENEVER we want (which is why i cringe when people bitch about depression and dont want to take advice from me, but im guilty of that as well).

Inside your brain is a neuronet consising of billinons of neurons and trillions of synapses. The cell is the smallest CONSCIOUS unit of the body (every cell in ur body is aware). Your dna unfolds according to a timeline (not tick tock tick time, but "measure of change" time.) positive emotions cause the DNA to unfold (and thus move ur life along) negative emotions cause it to tighten up (and stops ur life, usually a lesson that needs to be cleared before positive emotions are back, and life goes on to "next" lesson.

collective consciousness
so who am i?
the vast neuronet inside ur mind consists of billions and billions of conscious, alive, aware cells. basically, anything and everything, exists somewhere in ur mind already (tapping into higher power, channeling, etc). each cell is conscious, however, the "WHO AM I?" is the collective consciousness of every neuron. make sense?

this collective consciousness, which grows and "learns" as more is revealed from its "higher power" (the dna) through "prayer/meditation" (consistant positive emotion).

absolutely anything that exists in ur world, is a neuron/picture/whatever being projected outward.

anything you create for your "spiritual" developmente (basically anything you've read before reading this), was constructed for the purpose of inducing positive emotions around the clock, uncoiling your DNA (the christ DNA?) and making your universe bigger (so this is why meditation is "cumalative"?)


learning to have "faith" is actually learning to use intent... there is no higher power to pray to, you are it. there is a "lower" but higher power actually kinda sorta... the subconscious.

as i think back, in the most negative situations (which were life lessons and part of the script), when i would be depressed and in bed for months (ok it only happened once), it is possible for you to stagnate. i was in such a slump that i wouldnt let myself be happy at all (thus, no positive emotion, no dna uncoiling, the universe was thus at a standstill). i remember around that time out of no where i fell in love with video games and music again (i had been a skirt chaser and had let go of entertainment completely [except the skirt of course]). so through bumpin the shit outta my speakers and playing warcraft 3 i created some positive emotion and was thus moved along.

after a couple years i became a full fledged pothead and habitual delinquet. i stagnated again. i stagnanted to the point that a innate substance with ecstafying effects was introduced to me and i binged on it for a month so that my story would move on (unknowing to me).

so again when i became infatuated with a female and life came to a standstill, "the secret" and law of attraction were introduced. to get me to think positive and be a happy dreamer. to uncoil my DNA (which ill jus refer to as the script) since i was being stubborn and just wanted to be at a standstill. and of course the list goes on, of all the different views of life i tried, the religions, the diets, the fads, the drugs, the habits, the everything,

it all comes bak to you do what you do (NO MATTER WHAT IT IS) for the sake of feeling good (to stay alive) to uncoil the script and let the play go on. (now i feel kinda silly for taking so much of this spiritual shit literally).

what has ensued after in the past year or so, i reali cant explain. i guess it was just to put me in a deep deep rut, so that when i emerge it looks all that much merrier. im in a good state now because i dont have ANY urges, for ANYTHING, because i always know, no matter what i want to do, no matter what i think about it, i just wanna do it so i can feel good, and uncoil another strand of the script. thats all there is to it. before i had a constant state of anxiety, which i would dab over with happyness once every few days because the rest of the time i was too busy stressing. but now ive induced a permanent state of happyness, and weird coincidences are happening every second. lets see where this goes

any thoughts/suggestions?



*this would also explain bipolar/multiple personality disorders
more than one neuronet, without a connection between the two, so when personality changes occur the other personality is not "remembered" (at least not consciously).