I just wanted to make a thread where whe talk about our common life, something informal, where we say who we are and what we do, no labels, but say things as we perceive them.
If we are social, antisocial, how do we think people see us.
What are we doing, subjects that may be are not uncommon for somekind of people, but is boring for people around us.
I by example, work at a call center to assist people with their mobile phone issues, and eat a lot of anger from them, a lot of frustration.
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Have my savings on the stock market and I love to play Unreal Tournament 2004.
I had many girl friends, but I have 3 years without a formal relationship, thats because I can't stand no more to hurt or be hurted, now I feel insecure of starting anything formal.
The stock market absorbs my mind, but it goes really slow, like a garden, and even it is developing a lot of patience from me, some times I get really bored.
I save as much as I can and have no debts, that makes me feel confident of money, but it also makes me feel insecure of sharing my way of life with a girl, cause then my ordered chaos kind of life balance, will be in risk.
Being alone gaves me all the control of my life, being with somebody takes all control of it.
It is like being a passenger of a driver you don't trust, I don't like to lose control.
My current relationships are very light, I do what I want, she does what she wants, there is no relationship, but I keep control of my life, so I only date girls that want kind of the same, but obviously, never ends on a long term relation.
I'm on the stock market but I don't know other people who invest there, some times I met somebody who does, but they let the stock market quikly, I have almost 3 years in it.
About video games, I like unreal as my only first person shooter, I played a lot a game named elder scrolls, and love real time strategy games, any.
I used to go to a lot of bars, then I saw it as an unecesary expense, but went to parties, then I noticed that I enjoyed being alone.
Recently, I am going to bars again, but just as a social tool, I may be not enjoy being there, but I like the social bonds it creates, It's kind of a job for me, a job for making social relationships that I may even not fully enjoy, but consider them necesary.
What I would love is to leave to a pure state of mind, and in some model I see it possible.
Or I would love to go to a place, where everybody has my same interests, and have long conversations about what I like, but what I like changes to fast, so I may like to be moving to where people with my interests are or that people around me moves to the same interests.
But I recognize that we all are like our digital fingerprints, never the same, never orderer, and that the best way of making a life is to accept those around us, faking interest in what they like, and knowing that they can't remotely understand a little of my interests so they are not able to comment.
So back to loneliness.
I don't want anyone to comment on what I said, unleast is to share something similar, I'd like that we each, try to tell who we are in this thread, I know some of you will hear happier, others sad, angry, nostalgic, desperate, but talk about your self, take it out, once and for all, tell who you are and why you are/feel different.
Let this be an edonistic thread, where we all talk about our selfs, Me me me me.
Let's laught about our selfs, let's read our personalities, let's embrace our differences.
You know something, why I write to much?, it's because I have a hard time telling good bye, it's like hanging the phone on someone you like.
But, see you later.