i have so so hard time in my life..so hard..i can't deal with stuff..my family is falling apart..there's nothing i can do..i can't stop crying and we all know that tears are going nowhere..
my father is fighting cancer..and it's hard time for all of us..we are still fighting but other things are coming and i don't know how much we can take..couple of months ago my fathers younger brother just fall death at work..healthy and happy man..my fathers supporter no.1 after us of course..so that hit us straight down..it was terrible..5 days after my cousin's baby 8 months old died after 3 weeks of coma (she fall and hit her head) and my fathers mother have Alzhajmer..if you know about that sickness than you know how hard it gets when she doesn't remember about her son's illness or death..
and the most recently news are my other grandmother have cancer too..breast cancer..my sister was in hospital and i am ill too..and i don't see the end of this bad things coming..
now i am so afraid..i don't want to loose no one else..we are all so sad..and we don't see bright side..if we loose so many members of our family..i know that people are dieing but in this short time..this is to much..and everybody are our first family..first we were all together..not letting anyone to feel alone..but now i see we are all falling apart..inside..one by one..including me..i just wanna run away..and now more than ever i want to go to that home i seek for so long..
i just can't stand be sad anymore and the situation right now is like i will be sad for a long time..
so how all this is going on..and not stopping..we all have some feelings that this is not normal..like it is creepy..spooky..or whatever..or it's just too much of sadness..but then again..it is a bit weird..
my father and his brother were healthy both..and then first my father and then his brother..i am afraid that all this bad things will spend my fathers and ours energy for fighting..
why is this happening?