I can't take it anymore

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Hi,

I made a mistake. It ruined my relationship and he is breaking up with me now. (It was not any cheating-related or anything like that). I've tried everything to make it work, I am SO SORRY I can't even...
I can't take it anymore. I am now just a zombie, I can't think of anything, I don't want to do anything. What do I have to do?? I can't go back in time to prevent that mistake. I CAN NOT!
I'm not going in details, but I can't find anything to live for anymore and it's just breaking me into pieces.

Thanks...
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Zaborg
 
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by D a n e
[QUOTE=Zaborg;1005475]Hi,

I made a mistake. [/QUOTE]

Okay.


Was it a serious mistake or was he just over-reacting to a mediocre mistake.
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D a n e
 
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by ZIGMAN
I do not have much experience with this so I will just send you some of this, *100000000000 HUGS aaaaand some of this <3 <3 :)
You will be ok
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ZIGMAN
 
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by D a n e
[QUOTE=Zaborg;1005475]I can't go back in time to prevent that mistake. I CAN NOT!
[/QUOTE]


Image
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D a n e
 
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by Zaborg
I walked away without saying a word one day and he thought I was leaving for good but it was not my intention.
Saying sorry is not helping. What can I do??
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Zaborg
 
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by D a n e
[QUOTE=Zaborg;1005482]I walked away without saying a word one day and he thought I was leaving for good but it was not my intention.
Saying sorry is not helping. What can I do??[/QUOTE]

Oh, so he was just over-reacting. He was being too sensitive. I mean it is good to be sensitive, but being too sensitive to where you are being a bitch about everything can get on a lot of people's nerves. He will calm down and realize that you were both wrong for what you put each other through.
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D a n e
 
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by Zaborg
It was more than a month ago. I am so mad at myself, I can't even describe it. I'm sure he is not overreacting because it really hurt, and not only him, I literally hurt myself with that behavior (and knowing I hurt him makes me hurt even more, if that makes any sense...).

I haven't seen ever since, I said yesterday that I'll come over but he said no... :S
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Zaborg
 
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by ZIGMAN
Maybe do something that really shows your love for him! Show up with a bunch of his favorite food? Oooorrr roll in there like 30 heart box chocolates deep. You know him, maybe that could spark some ideas! Maybe write him a letter and add some other ideas that you know he will love and will show him and add it in with that! Mail it maybe if he absolutely wont talk to you. Probably better to give it in person though
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ZIGMAN
 
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by Remus
I feel you... I think I also know why you left when you did... I felt the same need many times in my relationship. My advice is to start working with yourself first. This will not take long. A day or two. You need to find this time somehow and spend it just with yourself. I recommend you start meditating. I know; it sounds challenging. Trust me, it is not so hard. I am also new to this and I found out it's quite a pleasurable and much needed activity. By meditation you will find healing of your soul and much more. Youtube will help you with the necessary techniques. Look for "guided meditation".

As far as your actions go, I would advise you to cool it down for the moment and suppress any attempt that you might have to get him to change his mind at this stage. It will not help you in any way if you do otherwise. I understand that yesterday you have established contact. This is good. Now he knows you still have the desire to be with him. But you have to understand. You have probably shocked this man to the core with your unusual behavior. If I were him I probably would have convinced myself during the time alone that you were never to come back, so I would have started the healing process... and you know what the first step is in this healing process, don't you? It's coping with the idea that from now on your life will go on without the other. So you start visualizing all kinds of situations that are to be in the future without your loved one... I know, it's a process that hurts like hell. I've been through it. So now put yourself in his shoes. You have visualized all this future existence without the other, you started to get used to the idea, you even had moments of optimism when you said to yourself that maybe it's a positive thing and that you should make some kind of masterplan in which to turn the negative into positive and switch your existence completely to the better. And one day what happens? This significant one (in this case you) calls you and announces you that they have changed their mind. For you, this is AGAIN another paradigm shift. It's like an emotional rollercoaster. That's why I say... leave him be for a while... just as you provided him the time to get used to the "without you" idea... now let him digest this new "with you" idea. Think about it... we are not robots. We can't switch that fast. We need a little bit of time...

Anyway, let me tell you something... we really are special in a lot of ways. Many people find it difficult not to love us ;). Some can get really frustrated because of this, cause they also consider us a little bit crazy :confused:, but they can't stop the love from happening!

I love you and wish you much happiness!
Remus
 
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by Starrr
One door closes another window opens.
PM me sometime, I'll listen to ya.
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Starrr
 
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[QUOTE=Zaborg;1005475]Hi,

I made a mistake. It ruined my relationship and he is breaking up with me now. (It was not any cheating-related or anything like that). I've tried everything to make it work, I am SO SORRY I can't even...
I can't take it anymore. I am now just a zombie, I can't think of anything, I don't want to do anything. What do I have to do?? I can't go back in time to prevent that mistake. I CAN NOT!
I'm not going in details, but I can't find anything to live for anymore and it's just breaking me into pieces.

Thanks...[/QUOTE]

Good day

Not to belittle you and your tragedy, but
it doesn't sound any worse than waking up one morning to find my pregnant wife
had disappeared. The ultimate in empty bed.... that shouldn't have been empty.

This event devastated me. I stopped feeling for years. I had to learn what emotions were.


Now, you could go back in time and correct that mistake. It is possible. However, I
will tell you that it really doesn't work. A dam doesn't just break, it takes years
of becoming unstable, of developing cracks before the fateful day of water bursting
forth.

I am telling you that you missed a hellava lot of signs. Goddess, I did. And, back
then, I really thought I was doing everything right. Being the good husband, the
provider... I now know, and can see what I did to her. What I didn't provide for
her. Where the relationship failed. And even, Thank Goddess the relationship failed.

I am so much better of a person now for having this experience and
having to rebuild, completely, myself. I would not wish this path on anyone, but it was
mine, and made me what I am.


I am very sorry for your loss.
I will tell you that if you learn from this, and become a better lover, partner and friend
you will attract another into your life that you can build an even better relationship with.

I know, right now it hurts, go into the hurt and really feel it.
Then start the climb back up to the good emotions.

Be well
BuilderOfCastles
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builderofcastles
 
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Zaborg, I know you are in a great deal of pain so I am going to say that if you are not feeling strong enough then wait for another time to read this comment:


This is what comes from being codependent with another person as opposed to connecting with another person where both people fel a strong wholeness within themselves first. What you are going through now is the end result of most of the twin flame soul mate relationships that come about.

Why would you feel you could not go on living because of another person leaving you? You are worth so much and you are certainly worth love and consideration. You know sometimes people with really great relationships decide to end it but they manage to do it with mutual respect and care for the other person and from what you are saying it sounds like you made a mistake, one that you feel badly about and want to amend for and you are just being treated like nothing. And here you are having given your heart completely away left wanting to end your very valuable life!

Relationships can be so hard, I know. Even harder when we don't have wholeness first, don't value ourselves, don't have basic self respect. Please think on this as a lesson and not the end of your life.
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BrandNewDay
 
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You should just find somebody new. It's not the end of the world. And in my opinion, you can't change people. So if he overreacted like that once, he's likely to do it in the future. And if this behavior causes you this much pain, I would recommend staying away.
Noename1
 
Posts: 114
Joined: Thu Jun 14, 2012 12:12 am

He should understand, I'm sensitive too but in some cases, I forgive and forget. How about you write a poem, that works to my knowledge! Wish the best!
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thegoodgirl101
 
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