I just started High School and hate it. I'm already failing math and I'm getting behind in French. I'm starting to worrie that I don't have enough talent to get a job I want (anything to do with the arts), or even get high enough marks to get into college Then there is all the people that go to my school. They laugh and make fun of me for how I look just because I am different. You try to help some one and the tell you to shut up! They're so obnoxious. I know not all of them are like this but most of the ones I've met are.

All my friends talk about are "cute guys", and dating. I'm not into that stuff. How can you like a person just because they shop at American Eagle, or just based on how "hot" they are? I don't care about looks, I care more about the actual person, like they're personality. They can look good and be a total shallow jerk. They pitty me and say I must be lonely because I don't have a boyfriend, call me weird because I don't want to have kids or get married. I don't even like hugging I don't want a boyfriend. Is there something wrong with me? I just don't feel like I can get close to anyone

My mom can't talk about my dad without getting mad and start ranting about how much he makes her mad and not giving her enough money for groceries, ect. For a while I thought they were going to get a devorce

My clocks stopped working now too, they won't keep time anymore and electrical stuff breaks around me. I think its stress or something. It stared happening last year. I also have panick attacks frequently and it really sucks if I get one in class because I can't leave to calm myself down. Ive had panick attacks ever since I was a kid. I actually had to see a psychologist for about a year. I was terrified to sleep alone and hated the dark. I still don't sleep well (wake up every 2 hours) and sleep with my cat, the lamp and the TV's on all night.

My grandma thinks I'm some kind of satan worshiping witch because I'm into Wicca and healing and all that stuff. I always wear my pentagram necklace.
I also study UFO's and any weird phenomenon. I'm sure she thinks I'm crazy. The only one who's really open to this type of thing is my mom.

Blah.... I must sound so crazy. What's wrong with me? Sorry for ranting but I'm mad and stressed I read some where it helps relieve stress to write about it so yeah Got any sugestions for help? I didn't know where to put this so if its in the wrong catagory sorry.

I'm sorry, but I smile because your situation sounds so very familiar to me. Goodness, as if you were telling me my high school days. Honey, you just have to think that it gets better. I know, so cliche, but it does.

All I can say is that you sound like a very wonderful person, very bright. Good head on your shoulders. Just because you don't fit in in a perticular group in school doesn't mean that there are not other like-minded people out there. Sounds to me like you know a bit more then they do. As long as /you/ know who you are and Spirit knows who you are, why should what they think matter? At the end of the day you have to stick by your morals and just go with your gut. They will respect you for not bowing to peer pressure or persuasion. Remember: Peer pressure only works if you allow it.

Haha! I'm 21 and still don't have a boyfriend, my dad still thinks I'm a devil worshipper, my mom doesn't believe in my gifts and people /still/ think I'm weird. But at the end of the day I wouldn't change myself for the world. I just wish the best for you and yours. Hey, it's still the beginning on the year, you've got time.

Ever want to talk, just PM me.

P.S. Personality is everything in a relationship. Looks are just a plus. ^_-

I Suggest manybe for the academic problem either speak to your teachers, maybe the classes you are in might be a bit to advanced for you, or seek the help of a tutor, or get a friend who is good the subject to study with you a bit more.


[/quote]Then there is all the people that go to my school. They laugh and make fun of me for how I look just because I am different. You try to help some one and the tell you to shut up! They're so obnoxious. I know not all of them are like this but most of the ones I've met are.[/quote]

Ignore them, then they will have nothing to use against you. If you get angry at them then they might keep doing it because they find it amusing to torment you, unfortunately that is the way bullies work.

[/quote]All my friends talk about are "cute guys", and dating. I'm not into that stuff. How can you like a person just because they shop at American Eagle, or just based on how "hot" they are? I don't care about looks, I care more about the actual person, like they're personality. They can look good and be a total shallow jerk. They pitty me and say I must be lonely because I don't have a boyfriend, call me weird because I don't want to have kids or get married. I don't even like hugging I don't want a boyfriend.[/quote]

Plain and simple is that you arent ready for a boyfriend because you havent found the correct person for you. Also in my view you are WAY TOO YOUNG to be thinking about marriage or children

[/quote]Is there something wrong with me? I just don't feel like I can get close to anyone .[/quote]

Let me be really clear on this point THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU, DONT EVEN GO DOWN THAT PATH

[/quote]My mom can't talk about my dad without getting mad and start ranting about how much he makes her mad and not giving her enough money for groceries, ect. For a while I thought they were going to get a devorce .[/quote]

Unfortunately that is a situation that your mum and dad need to resolve between them, all you can do is let them know you love them very much and that might help alot also.
[/quote]My clocks stopped working now too, they won't keep time anymore and electrical stuff breaks around me. I think its stress or something. It stared happening last year. I also have panick attacks frequently and it really sucks if I get one in class because I can't leave to calm myself down. Ive had panick attacks ever since I was a kid. I actually had to see a psychologist for about a year. I was terrified to sleep alone and hated the dark. I still don't sleep well (wake up every 2 hours) and sleep with my cat, the lamp and the TV's on all night.[/quote]

I know of some techniques that may help you, my daughter is only 2 years old and she use to wake up every 2 hours but there is something I do that seems to help her sleep through the night if you want to know just PM me and I will lead you through it if you want to try, dont worry it isnt anything satanic or anything it doesnt even involve words

Electrical things can go wrong when people are stressed

[/quote]My grandma thinks I'm some kind of satan worshiping witch because I'm into Wicca and healing and all that stuff. I always wear my pentagram necklace.
I also study UFO's and any weird phenomenon. I'm sure she thinks I'm crazy. The only one who's really open to this type of thing is my mom.[/quote]

Well talk to your grandma and sit her down and talk to her and let her know the reasons why you like the pendant you have and why you like the unexplained, it might help calm her fears.

If you mum is open to these things then at least you have someone to talk to about this it might be nice to try and see how your mum reacts to you

[/quote]Blah.... I must sound so crazy. What's wrong with me? Sorry for ranting but I'm mad and stressed I read some where it helps relieve stress to write about it so yeah Got any sugestions for help? I didn't know where to put this so if its in the wrong catagory sorry.[/quote]

It will get better I promise.

Hi Vira, Idle was pretty much right on the button. I have to say that you sound like a very keen and sensitive soul. I like this. I'd like to offer you some ideas that might make life a little more bearable.

The people that surround you like classmates and teachers are very visual and judgemental people. You and I both know this. You are setting yourself up for resistance and negative energy by forcing them to accept you. Take a breath, and before you start shaking your fist in the air and demanding that everyone honor your individuality, hear me out.

If the people look at you and think harsh thoughts you are going to feel it. Is the need to express yourself worth the hassle? Wear the pentagram on a longer chain. It's important to you. Others may be reacting violently to it and vibing you negatively. Just remove the stimulus. You can relax and be yourself after school.

Do I think it is fair that people judge you on your appearance alone. NO. I do think you should use that to your advantage. I wear a suit when I travel because I get better treatment. It is how I play the public game. At home I wear a belly dancing skirt and jeweled top, because I like it.

I'm just offering some de stressing tricks.

The electrical stuff total drag. Make time to get more physically active. Run, dance, swim whatever you love to help drain off some of the stress that is collecting in your body.

Panic attacks and lack of peaceful sleep. You have my sympathy for sure on these things. Set up a safe, comfy environment and create a sleep time ritual to follow every night. I lower the lights, take a supplement called Melatonin, and read a little before I go to sleep. Learn some breathing meditations.

Begin to see yourself as a strong, beautiful, complete human being. Look in the mirror and say 5 nice things about yourself everyday. As you send out a good and self confident vibe people will respond to you in much more positive ways.

Oh, and eat some good protiens.

Thanks for the help guys I guess I'll have to dye my hair back. Its green and purple streaked

Lol. Cute. I always wanted blue hair so I bought a blue wig and wore it everywhere. I was in my 30's. The Goth kids hated it, but the grannies thought it was awesome! Who knew?