[FONT=century gothic]Hi Rae, [/FONT]
[FONT=century gothic]I was born in 1985... So I am old, for an indigo. Honestly, it has been difficult to live in the world as it is. I new very young that I was different from everyone in my family, and most people at school. I had some visions here and there, but the strongest thing was that I could feel energies everywhere. I still do, I have this massive sometimes engulfing empathy, and with it a healing power too. My parents divorced when I was 7, both of them of course had different stories and tried to brainwash me as such, which made me really angry, because I already that young, felt like the whole world was all about brainwashing, and I didn't want my parents to do it too. On top of that I am a Piscarian (pisces/aries cusp) and so I naturally have intuitive sensitivities, but also on the aries side, a strong sense of individuality, and almost an aggression when it comes to getting my point across ( I have learned to be more assertive now). After my parents divorced, my dad brought us to church...at 8 years old I was sneaking out of Sunday school to sit in the field and meditate (although I didnt call it meditating then) when I was caught I openly expressed my feelings that I din't buy what the church was selling, and that what they were preaching is simply not what I held as truth in my heart. I felt pushed into valuing something that I simply didn't value. My mother was always saying that i was different and had a 6th sense, and she honored it, but didn't really know how to nurture it. She tried to take me to counseling when I ran out of an indoor yard sale/tag sale sweating and choking when I was 9. The energy in that house was the worst I have ever felt in my life, I remember the feeling of having to get out of that house. I always had vivid and recurring dreams and I still do. In school I was rebellious in every sense of the word. I thought nothing of telling a teacher right where to go, and I ended up getting suspended a lot. One time my dad and mom had to go in for a conference at school because my teacher (who I had swore at and called out) thought that I was cheating because I didn't show my math work....in the meeting he showed my dad a paper of the kind of work we were doing, and i went over and did the problems upside down in minutes, and floored him and my dad. I II was exceptional in art, foreign language, and well thing that I wanted to learn. Although I got suspended a really lot I ended up graduating early. I learned how to use Reiki and went to nursing school, and got straights As, because I loved it, and college was less constricting. Through my career I had good jobs, patients loved me, and so did coworkers. My empathy and understanding of people without having to speak proved an excellent trait for me in nursing, especially in psyche, and hospice. I ended up in mental health dealing with combative and extremely assaultive patients, but I had a way with them. I put out trusting "I know you don';t want to hurt me" energy, and had better luck than others with these patients, and deep down I truly wasn't afraid of them...most of them the i could "see". I got more complements and praise from patients and family and it was great. I was known by bosses and management for innovative thinking and problem solving, having great rapport, and being a strong advocate. Until one day as a member of a council aimed at bettering unti practice and policies, I brought up some suggestions which apparently were threatening to the organizations public image. (They were just safety concerns, and ideas, but things seemed to be getting out of hand on the unit as a whole, and I though that we should do a survey of staff to see which areas they thought needed the most work) and I was fired. A single mother out of work and unable to do anything about it. (also during this time I had 8 family members die) I have been out work now since August!!!! I have never been unemployed, and I have always been a healer, and my purpose was to help people, and see people, and it was taken away. I lost my soul for a little while, and was very bitter(very bitter). If healthcare wasn't all wrong enough to begin with being 99% business and 1% caring, how could they do that to me? Anyways long story short, I fell into a deep hole of depression...one of the hardest parts of my indigo spirit is that I love being me, I love the way I am, but the way I am isn't meshing with the world. The world needs to change, but it hasn't yet, and it is going to take a lot of work to do it. I have almost constantly been shot down or made unattainable somehow. I was depressed for about three months pretty badly, and then, I went soul searching; I meditated every night, and delved into nature, and although I am still unemployed, I feel a stronger sense of power all together. I learned astrology, and have been developing my psychic intuition more and more, and I am beginning to feel more grounded. As for the future, I think the only path I can take and truly be happy, is something entrepreneurial. Hopefully it works out. I know it is hard, because there are not very many of us in this generation. That sense of just knowing more and "getting it more" is true, I always felt like a see a whole world beyond others and its hard to utilize that and not sound all Merlin. I felt like when I would admit that to people, they would look at me like some gypsy witch over a crystal ball. But the most liberating that has happened to me since my little ummm....employment break is not giving a crap. I know what I have to offer now, and I don't care what they think or say, because it is right with my soul, and I am being true to myself. best of luck. If you need to talk more, i can send you my e-mail!