Dealing with a secret crush Help!

This guy is very spiritual and knows about Higher Consciousness, the unseen and Indigos. He, married and has 4 youngsters at home, looks ten years younger than he actually is and he likes my mom who has similar interests.
At first, when I met him, I thought he looks plain and socially awkward, but boy was I wrong.I saw him smile and the world seemed different. This guy is my boss, my mentor's mentor, knows more about life's lessons. Right now, I am staying with some likeminded souls in a foriegn country and I have to respect my elders. But for some reason, I still have amirable feelings for him. Not sexually but like vibrationally. But for some reason, sometimes I want to do unspeakable things to him and I just dont know how to deal with it.

You're dealing with it right now.,

Try your best to keep your distance as much as possible...I mean, look at the circumstances. He's your boss, he's married, and has four kids. Don't destroy his family.Think of it like that.

Use your thoughts as guidance.I think "crushes" teach you lessons. Maybe these feelings you have towards this person stems from a past life, and you must make a decision about this infatuation. Either go with it, or end it, it's up to you.

But, I'm only giving you my advice...only you have control over your life.Do what you think is fair.

I know he's probably a past life connection because I dream about him in another reality and it's definitely an infatuation because I am away from my family. I am just admiring him from a distance, praying for my family and his family because he's a bit overwhelmed with his kids. The more and more I think about his life, the more I realize he is too busy trying to make money for his family and trying to help humanity at the same time. He's nothing more than a father, Uncle or brother to me.

Thanks for taking your time to talk therapy with me. I think I had to let my feelings out somewhere.

I had (and still having) huge crushes for my professors\educated people in general many times and the way that I am dealing with it is always the same and now it's much easier, as I know how to deal with it. These are the steps I follow

1) Accept is as something normal and natural and not as a "curse"

Yes, those feelings exist, we are human and it is totally normal if you consider the source of the attraction. Attraction isn't magic. We reflect things we need to other people, so in other words people represent what we need at certain time periods. It's the most human and pure consequence of the aforementioned reflection. But you know, society has a set of values preset and tricks us into believing that having certain feelings are taboo, making them look kinky, dirty and forbidden and consequently making you feel ashamed. This make the process of "completing" the cycle of having a crush really rocky. Accept your feelings, don't lock them in the closet, as you risk their power will be multiplied in magnitude.

2) After accepting them, let your feelings take over when you are in your personal space.

Yes I'm serious. Let them take over. You want to do unspeakable things to him? Caress his body? Believe me I had the same feelings too. This is a natural consequence of having strong feelings for someone. The spirit is connected to the body, so mental attraction may manifest itself as having a physical attraction. Your spirit wants to express those feelings somehow but because you don't give them any means of expressing themselves, they will make you boil inside. So go ahead, have the kinkiest unspeakable fantasies that you wouldn't have ever imagined having, pleasure yourself while having them. Do that till you are completely exhausted and calm. It helps clear your mind and realising any accumulated tension. This is what I did too

3) Then start the inner searching, ask yourself questions

Ask yourself "What is going in my life right now?", "What aspects of myself do I project to that person in particular",

In my case, I realised the important part my professors played in my life. My professors were there when I was bullied in elementary school, they motivated me, they protected me. To add to that, I was constantly bullied of the misconception that just because I was tall, I was dumb as well, which is totally untrue. This left a permanent scar, because I adored smart people from a really early age and wanted to become one. My professors healed that scar, because they accepted me for me as a person and said that anyone could be smart if he wanted too. Of course those kind of people will make a perfect match for me, I mean look at my scars and my history.

4) How can I satisfy those needs by myself and how can I show my feelings to him, in an acceptable and appropriate way?

"So, having thought of that....what do I do next?", I thought. My feelings were certainly in control, but I didn't feel complete. I wanted to tell\show them how grateful I was that I had them in my life and how I admired them and loved them. So what I did to complete myself, is tell them how much I adored and loved them and being around and how much I respected them. I helped them in their projects, I'm considered one of their best hardworking students and seeing them proud of me. I magically started to feel more safe and relieved in my own feelings, as I without knowing at first, covered my own needs, became what I wanted and what I projected to them, an educated, kind and loving person.

Hope it helps you out a little bit.
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