If anyone shoves any mail through my letterbox like this again I shall complain vociferously to the Arch Deacon's cat, Twinky. I resent aliens just falling through any empty space they feel comfortable to encroach upon and leaving messes on the carpet i just had cleaned 3 years ago. I DO NOT COOK CURRY. You can ask all you want but ITS NOT ON THE MENU.
Anyway, i am continuously surrounded by these horrendous creatures and i have had enough. Last time they borrowed my lawn mower i have not had it back yet and its been 16 minutes now and i am standing by the front gate with 2 shotguns and a packet of Orio's while I type this in my phone. There are 2 by the tree the dogs use across the street right now and they look suspiciously like politicians to me. I must get my alien looking glasses to get a better view. Just standing there they are, with a green tourbillon duct taped to their foreheads counting seconds out loud to each other. oppp. wait a bit one of them is moving through the vortex towards me.
i had to stop writing a minute as i had both hands on the shotgun shoved up its nose. Nasty thing. asking ME for a vormentaal brochette with tongue sauce. when will it ever stop? all they think about is exotic foods. and dumping old freezers in my back yard when i am out shopping for cantaloupes with body parts in that bring all the neighbourhood cats running to my yard. disgusting.
its backed off now and is counting the leaves in the street gutter in something thats sounds very suspiciously like Swahili to me. hardly a respectful use of communication for telepathic aliens with out of date laundry tickets.
Anyway, if its got to be made up, at least keep the tense consistant otherwise it does look like a script for a Star Wars movie by Disney.
FORGET WHAT YOU WANT?
GET RID OF WHAT YOU NEED.
FRESH AIR AND SUNSHINE
WORKS FOR ALL TREES